In Search of a Soul Mate

We all search for our soul mates and dream of a perfect relationship with them, but do we know what we’re looking for?


Most of us yearn for a soul mate – someone who makes us feel complete. However, the notion of a soul mate has been misrepresented and distorted to such a degree by films and books that many of us have an unrealistic idea of what a soul mate actually is. For those of us buying into the celluloid version, it is an instant recognition of someone who will intuitively understand our needs and wants.

However, pursuing this version of a soul mate can only end in disappointment. True soul mates are not a quick-fix solution to all of our life’s problems. Nor are they necessarily bound together for eternity. True soul mates are the result of a great deal of psychic and spiritual work, with both parties taking on an active role in the relationship. In searching for a soul mate, most people think of a parallel version of themselves. They think of someone who likes the same things, thinks the same thoughts and feels the same feelings.

However, in psychic terms, this sort of relationship can only result in spiritual stagnation. After all, if both parties are more or less the same, what is there left to discover? How is it possible to grow spiritually if you both want the same things? A true soul mate is not there to simply reflect your personality. They are there to complement your spiritual self, and the difference between those two points is vast. Two spirits that complement one another Spiritually complementing someone is far harder than physically doing so. In complementing someone’s personality, the notion is that you enhance their good points and render their bad points almost invisible. To spiritually complement another psychic being, you still enhance their good points, but the real work focuses on the negative aspects of their spirit.

In order to fully complement another person – physically, mentally and psychically – the negative aspects of their being must be examined closely and built upon. It serves no purpose to rid someone of their negative qualities. Instead, they must be encouraged to recognise and admit these qualities in order to gain control over them. In addition to your soul mate gaining control over aspects of their psyche, you will also achieve a greater understanding of yourself. In recognising a problem within another, you are admitting the existence of that quality within yourself. It is only by completely understanding another spirit that the two can truly grow together.

However, just as lives do not last forever, nor do soul mates. Upon the death of a partner, many people deprive themselves of finding further happiness by refusing to become involved with other people. Rather than an act of loyalty, this is an act of fear. In order to fully connect with another on a spiritual level, you have to make your own spirit vulnerable. Allow others to see it, warts and all. Beginning another psychic adventure with another partner can be too imposing a thought.

However, by denying that adventure, those that choose to remain single are limiting themselves on a psychic level, for new spirits will focus on new aspects of their partner’s psyche. Instead of moving on to create a more spiritually rounded relationship, these people choose to stop learning and psychically stagnate.

Is he/she your soulmate? Chat now to one of our Love and Relationship experts

More than one soul mate

Many people believe that it is possible to have more than one soul mate. They believe that true spiritual love should not be confined to just one partner. These people believe that friends, family and even pets can be their soul mates just as much as a loved one can. This theory gives credence to the adage that your friends reflect aspects of yourself. The more psychic bonds we establish with those around us, the more developed and spiritually developed we become. It may be that, rather than just needing the spiritual attention of just one person, the more psychic links we establish, the richer we become.

Some past-life therapists believe that any meaningful relationship can be a soul mate one. It could be with your friends or relatives and does not necessarily have to be romantic to qualify as a ‘soul mate’ relationship. Indeed, very notion of the soul mate is may be an incorrect one, for it relies on the notion that there is only one perfect person for you on the planet.

As we have seen, focusing all your efforts to find that ‘one single perfect soul mate’ may mean that you end up missing out on other meaningful relationships throughout your life, or even not giving enough importance to other relationships you may form throughout your life. Perhaps the best way to prepare yourself for a soul mate relationship is to try and gain as much inner spiritual awareness as possible. This does not mean eradicating all negativity from your spirit. Instead, it means accepting all you are, including your faults, and being aware of your self-worth. Only by being receptive to our own spirits can we hope to attune to the spirits of others.

Is he/she your soulmate? Chat now to one of our Love and Relationship experts